WHO'S UP FOR SOME GNOCCHI?

 

Not that! I typed 'gnocchi'.

I make home-made gnocchi from time to time. Tonight I'm preparing kumara gnocchi in a garlic cream sauce. Yum!

I got the recipe some time ago from a New World supermarket but you can find it on-line as well. In case Richard wants to show off to his Italian guest here's some info on making it.

Maybe a bottle of Rockford sparkling shiraz will go well with it.

THE GOURMET

I really like Tony Hancock comedy, whether in the TV show format or the radio shows.

I listened to this today and in a way it made me think of sitting down to dinner in a restaurant with Richard and Robert.

I see myself as Hancock with Richard as Sid James and Robert as Bill Kerr.

See (or listen) what you think.

OKONOMIYAKI

Years ago, when we were living in Christchurch, one of The Old Girl's associates, Lindsay who's wife and he has become good friends of ours and she would once a month meet up for a meal and a glass of wine in the city. They discovered a great Japanese restaurant - the name of which I can't remember and it probably ended up under tonnes of rubble seeing that it was in the 'danger zone' - which we used to go to. It was one of those interesting Japanese eateries where you can sit at a 'bar' and have drinks while the chef, in front of you, cooked on tremendously hot and large griddles producing fantastic dishes amidst shooting flames, steam and sizzling sounds.

Teppanyake style

One of our favourite dishes at this restaurant and one that was new to us was okonomiyake, which is a Japanese 'street food' type of pancake made with vegetables, rice flour, eggs and seafood - usually prawns. Every time we went there, as well as sampling other delectable dishes we would default to okonomiyake.

After leaving Christchurch in about 2000 we went to many other Japanese restaurants in Auckland, Wellington, Australia, NYC, Toronto, York and  London but never again discovered okonomiyake or at least not anything like the dish that enthralled us in Christchurch. We did come across variants in cafes but they were pale imitations.

We tried to make it ourself at home on occasions but without a recipe (we did search) it was a bit hit or miss.

On Monday The Old Girl had to go down to Auckland and stayed overnight with the lovely Ilse and Lindsay who - surprise surprise had discovered a recipe for okonomiyake. Obviously Lindsay had been going through withdrawal as well. The recipe that she discovered is by the outstanding and favourite of mine ,Annabel Langbein whose recipes I follow with relish. Well, not with relish unless that was one of her recipes ( a pedantic old schoolteacher joke there).

Ilse cooked the pancakes for Lynn, them and their son on Monday night but also made two extra pancakes for Lynn to bring home with her. We warned these up and had with salad last night. Outstanding and very reminiscent of the pancakes we had in that Christchurch restaurant  nearly 30 years ago. I'll be cooking these in the near future - that's for damned sure. 

I hope that you can read the recipe and recommend trying it out. We used Hoisin sauce on top with some Japanese mayonnaise.

COOK OFF!

 We've* noticed the rise of television cooking competitions and the influence these have on the general populace. Even the old bloggers in this community pepper (see what I did there?) their posts with mention of meals they have made or are about to. Robert the inconvenient sinner is the champignon, sorry, champion here.

We* thought it opportune to have a little cooking competition amongst the primary bloggers - Richard of Richard's Bass Bag, Robert the inconvenient sinner and moi representing The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ.

Robert was charged with the responsibility of finding a suitable venue and ensuring attendance by a non-partisan public to taste and rate the dishes.

Here's how the competition works:

The contestants have each chosen a dish that shows what type of food they prefer and to demonstrate their culinary proficiency. Before unveiling (or unwrapping) their chosen dish a short interview with them will be conducted by an independent food critic and religious person (they are honest aren't they?) Pastor Usebydate.

Pastor Usebydate: First up we have Richard of Richard's Bass Bag. Hello Richard.

Richard of RBB: Hello Pastor You're pleased to be here.

Pastor Usebydate: Mmmm ..... right. Are you a pescatarian by any chance?

Richard of RBB: No, I'm a pissartist. Why do you ask?

Pastor Usebydate: It's just that you reference a fish in your blog title ......

Richard of RBB: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Pastor Usebydate: Ha ha ha ha ha ha .... I thought you'd like that. We religious people like to have a laugh.

Richard of RBB: (sotto voce) Yes at everyone's expense.

Pastor Usebydate: What's that son?

Richard of RBB: I said "I must repent"

Pastor Usebydate: Yes, well, there's still time. Tell us something about your meal choice today?

Richard of RBB: My inspiration comes from a dish I developed on my first OE ...

Pastor Usebydate: OE?

Richard of RBB: Yes, overseas experience back in 1975 when ...

Pastor Usebydate: You went overseas in 1975?

Richard of RBB: Er .... well, I went to Christchurch and had to go by ferry. Anyway, while there I invented a dish that even The Curmudgeon liked when he visited.

Pastor Usebydate: The Curmudgeon visited you?

Richard of RBB: Well yes. He was really in Christchurch to buy wine and stayed with Tony and Jan but I guess he got hungry and kind of hung around my place during the day.

Pastor Usebydate: Aha! But didn't you have a female friend staying at that time who was quite attractive?

Richard of RBB: Yes, that was .... hey! Are you suggesting that The Curmudgeon wasn't calling around just for my food and company?

Pastor Usebydate: Well, not your company anyway. So, you invented a dish?

Richard of RBB: (sulking) Whatever.

Pastor Usebydate: Okeedokee ..... we'll look forward to that dish being unveiled later. Good luck Richard of Richard's Bass Bag.

***************

Pastor Usebydate: Next up we have Robert the inconvenient sinner who ..... Robert, why do you go by the name Robert the inconvenient sinner?

Robert the inconvenient sinner: I don't.

Pastor Usebydate: You don't?

Pastor Usebydate: No. I call myself Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner. It's those other guys who make fun of my name and change it to other things.

Pastor Usebydate: I just think that they're being kind eh. (looking at the camera and waggling his eyebrows and softly saying 'Sheesh').

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Whatever.

Pastor Usebydate: Okeedokee, we'd best move on. Tell me Robert ... the whatever, what inspired your dish creation today?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Jesus.

Pastor Usebydate: Jesus?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Yes Jesus. I like Jesus. I like to eat Jesus. I like ....

Pastor Usebydate: Yes, that'll be enough of that thank you. We're talking about your culinary inspiration today.

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Huh. My colono .... sorry, no, those are gravy stains.

Pastor Usebydate: Huh? Oh, I see (and cannot unsee). Whatcha cooking today Rob?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Ah. Well, you know that I like to cook right? I like to cook left as well ......

Pastor Usebydate: ..............

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: ...... that was a little joke.

Pastor Usebydate: Was it? Well, put it away and tell us about your dish.

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: (embarrassed) Umm, I like to cook vegetarian dishes with a twist.

Pastor Usebydate: A twist?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Yes, a twist. I like to use meat ....

Pastor Usebydate: .... In your vegetarian dishes?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Yes. Anything with two or four feet - pork, beef, lamb, mutton, chicken, - Duck!

Pastor Usebydate: Duck?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Yes ... DUCK!  My bird just got out of the cage. Have you seen a cockatoo Pastor?

Pastor Usebydate: Hey! What are you implying I .... oh, I see. No.

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: Well I'd better clean up the mess that bird made.

Pastor Usebydate: OK Robert. Good luck with the competition.

***********************

Pastor Usebydate: Well that was interesting.** We've just got time to talk to The Food Curmudgeon who is representing The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ. Welcome The Food Curmudgeon.

The Food Curmudgeon: Hi Pastor. Do you find that title confusing given your position as food critic?

Pastor Usebydate: Huh?

The Food Curmudgeon: Never mind.

Pastor Usebydate: (glowering) What inspired you with your selection today?

The Food Curmudgeon: Well, lots of things really. I love food, all types of food. I love Japanese food, Chinese, Italian, French, Spanish - all food. In New Zealand we've developed recipes and food ideas from around the world ....

Pastor Usebydate: OK, now we'd ....  

The Food Curmudgeon: To live a full life, you have to fill your stomach first.

Pastor Usebydate: Yes, but we'd ....

The Food Curmudgeon: Cheese is the glue that holds my life together.

Pastor Usebydate: Right. Now, moving on ....

The Food Curmudgeon: People who love to eat are always the best people.

Pastor Usebydate: Look Curmudgeon I've ....

The Food Curmudgeon: Patience is the secret to good food

Pastor Usebydate: Christ ... I mean 'Crikey'.

The Food Curmudgeon: Hunger is a good cook.

Pastor Usebydate: MOVE ALONG PLEASE!

The Food Curmudgeon: Don’t be upsetti, eat some spaghetti.

Pastor Usebydate: Sheesh!

The Food Curmudgeon: Sorry - you were saying?

Pastor Usebydate: How do you think you will fare (see what I did there?) in the competition?

The Food Curmudgeon: Not very well.

Pastor Usebydate: What? I thought you claimed that you are a good cook?

The Food Curmudgeon: I did and I am but have you seen the venue that Robert selected and have you seen his choice of voting public? They look like they haven't eaten in years.

Pastor Usebydate: Oh well. Good luck on the day

The Food Curmudgeon: (sulking) Whatever.

*********************

The Venue: Hutt Park Hotel chosen for its convenient location according to Robert.

The Judges: 40 of the Saturday lunchtime patrons.

The results: 

First Richard of Richard's Bass Bag with 27 votes.

Second Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner with 13 votes.

Third The Food Curmudgeon with no votes.

The dishes:

Richard of Richard's Bass Bag: 

- Baked beans with cheese on toast.

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner:

- Mince and pasta with bacon and mushrooms, Wattie's sauce and wedges, McCains reconstituted mashed potato, rice risotto, Pam's frozen peas and corn, roast lamb, pig's trotters and beef burgers. A slice of lemon on top to give a 'Tuscan' flavour. 

The Food Curmudgeon:

 - Pear, walnut & blue cheese tart with whole truffle roast celeriac with cheese sauce & hazelnuts.

*******************

Pastor Usebydate: Now that was interesting. The people have chosen Richard's dish as the winner. Congratulations Richard. Was that a surprise to you as well.

Richard of Richard's Bass Bag: No, not really. As you know Richard's Bass Bag is  the original bass bagging site and so we cook meals that no one else would ever consider. Hey .... can someone open a window in here...

Pastor Usebydate: Robert - well done on second placing (that's natural I guess being your default position and even your name at one time if I recall). How do you feel about the competition?

Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner: I think I overdid it with the lemon.

Pastor Usebydate: Food Curmudgeon. You came last. What did you ...

The Food Curmudgeon: Sheesh!

Pastor Usebydate: Whatever.

* The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ




** NOT.

AN INDULGENCE

 Not one of these silly things that nearly scuppered the Catholic Church back in the sixteenth century.

The Old Girl cooked duck risotto last night.

She makes this by slow cooking duck pieces (breast, legs) in a slow-cooker. She then drains off the juices and fat and shreds the meat to mix in with risotto she makes from arborio rice. Yummy.

She uses the juices to make duck stock which we freeze and use later in soups, stews and casseroles.

We used to pour off the fat but recently she's taken to separating this and using for duck-fat chips. Duck-fat chips, if you are unfamiliar with them are a must-have delicacy in restaurants and well worth trying. Today for lunch I used some left-over cooked potatoes which I cut into small chunks and sautéed in the duck fat. I also fried an egg in the fat and had this on a thick slice of toast from the home-made wholemeal bread  that I had baked yesterday. Wowee!

I don't recommend eating like this too often as the calorie intake is whopping but as a treat, as an indulgence if you will, it's a wonder that Martin Luther doesn't come knocking at the door.

"I smell duck fat. Let me in."

A WORD FROM THE WISE(GUY)

 The other day I made a pasta sauce that was so delicious it will become my 'go to' sauce in the future.

It was from Annabel Langbein's cooking book More Taste Than Time which we've had for many years. The dish was named simply 'Pasta Siciliana'

I've never met Annabel but I did know her sister Prue at university.

As you can see the recipe is simple and the cooking time very short but the explosion of flavour from the combination of kumara, orange juice and the herbs is outstanding. The orange cuts through the otherwise heaviness of the tomato flavour.  One orange was all iI needed and I only used half of a medium sized golden kumara which was enough when cubed. I grated Colby cheese together with Parmesan for the topping. While the kumara, orange juice and pureed tomatoes were simmering I quickly sautéed some pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds and pine-nuts in a pan with some orange and chilli oil. These were crunchy and added the 'wow; factor to the dish.I really recommend this as it's fresh, flavoursome and healthy and any fool can make it.

I know that Richard will like it and Robert could slaughter a pig or a lamb or something to add to it.

FISH TACOS

 That 'Food, Glorious Food' post by The Curmudgeon reminded me that I haven't written a post for a while. Mea Culpa or, as Richard might say - "il vecchio gatto annusa il sedere del cane" - or something like that.

I've obviously cooked some delicious meals over the last two months using tried and true recipes but one variation stands out.

The Old Girl likes it when I prepare tacos for dinner. These are crispy tacos heated in the oven and then filled with layers of a hot bean mix (red kidney beans fried with garlic and chillies), tomatoes, cheese, lettuce and spring onion. It is a delicious meal and leaves you feeling good afterwards.

A couple of weeks ago - a Friday, Robert - I varied this by substituting the bean mix with a fish one. I cubed some snapper into very small pieces and covered in seasoned flour. This I pan-fried quickly with diced capsicum, chilli, garlic, ginger and some Jalapenos. I proceeded to put the tacos together the same way as the bean ones but left out the cheese. The result? Fabulous. This is going on the list.